Networking Secrets From the Samurai Warrior
Have you ever watched a martial arts expert prepare? Have you noticed how different they are compared to the average man on the street? How invincible they look. If you watched them at the buffet eating a chicken leg, you’d think it was a lethal weapon and their demeanour suggests that they have the psychological advantage. They stand strong, they feel strong, they think strong, so they look strong. Bushido means ‘practising calmness of behaviour and composure of the mind neither of which should be bothered by passion of any kind’. It’s all about where you focus all your energy, where your attention is.
Now I want you to stand up. Yes that’s right. Stand up now. Take a deep breath in through your nose. Fill your lungs. Go on, deep breath. Now breathe again. Breathe out. Breathe in again, and again. Keep you feet shoulder width apart, head up. Now focus only on one spot in front of you. One spot in the distance, or on the wall. Dead ahead. Now as you look imagine that your whole consciousness, your mind, your thoughts and your feelings are moving down from your head to a spot just below your Naval. This is your centre, your Hara.
Until Next Time
Warmest Regards
Wendy
Every person who has ever started out on his or her own (well unless you’re Donald Trump of course) has felt like this when venturing into the scary world of Networking. For some people it’s a piece of cake, for other’s its worse than taking their driving test, or walking the plank.
But just calm down a minute, because you are not alone and this is really, REALLY common; I confess to being absolutely terrified the first time I went to a networking meeting, AND it was first thing and I am not a morning person. Once I even set my alarm incorrectly so I arrived at 5.45 a.m. instead of 6.45 a.m. (did I feel stupid or what? Fortunately, there wasn’t anyone around to actually WITNESS me feeling completely stupid.) But we can all do with a little bit of help sometimes. This topic came up again and again in my recent survey as a matter of fact.
I bring with me a visitor from a far away land, with a secret that you could use to take your networking to another level. But first, we need to take you away from here. So come with me and let’s meet a special person, a VERY special person, who’s going to change your life.

January 31, 2010 No Comments
Networking - “Don’t Show Up and Throw Up”
It appears that networking is something that many small business owners struggle with. If we go into ’sell’ mode straight off, we could miss valuable opportunities, and alienate ourselves, because we’ve missed the point of what networking actually is. Networking can help us to find our target audience, give other people the chance to get to know us and discover what our speciality is. Not necessarily a reason to flog our stuff to anyone who is warm and has a pulse!
I conducted a survey of entrepreneurs this week, because I wanted to know the kind of challenges they face as I’d like to work with more of them. And lo and behold, one of the topics that appeared consistently was networking, sales and marketing.
Now, I’m not talking as a marketing genius, and I don’t claim to be a specialist in that area. However, the other day I was listening to one of Adam Urbanski’s (The Marketing Mentor) recordings from one of his marketing boot camps. He was teaching a group of business owners about marketing. He says that in order to get customers - first you need to let people know you exist , then develop a relationship with them before you start flogging your stuff.
Then Adam said the following 5 words which made me laugh out loud.
When you attend a networking meeting “Don’t show up and throw up!”
He doesn’t mean this literally of course (unlike the guest at the Christmas party I attended a few years who threw up over my shoes…)
But there seems in some quarters, a universal ignorance of certain rules of networking. And what those new to it are completely unaware of.
Picture the total stranger who literally pins you against the wall at the networking event, shoves their postcard under your nose and then proceeds to spend the next 40 minutes trying to persuade you to join their business opportunity, buy their particle accelerator or drones on about how “it does this, and that, and that and blah blah blah”
Meanwhile you’re hoping that the fire alarm will go off, or that tall dark handsame man with the naughty grin will saunter over and grab your attention instead.
But no, instead it’s chapter and verse from Mr or Mrs Serial Networker, until you’re ready to punch their lights out and you’d wished you’d gone to that other networking event on the other side of town.
Do show up but instead of regurgitating over your next victim try this:-
- Ask a genuine question - and gather some information about that person and what they do. Be curious - talk to them as if they were from Mars and you’ve never been there before and so you’re gathering vital information
- Spend at least 10 minutes listening and acknowleding this fact by nodding and chipping in where appropriate with useful insights and observations - just ‘get out of the way’ and focus on them
- Ask them some more questions and get them to elaborate if something sparks your interest
- Offer to help them if you can by sharing some of your expertise insights
- Tell them what you do expressing the benefits of your product or service without boring the pants off ‘em
- Most of us (as human beings) will know whether or not what we’ve said has made any lights go on in the other person’s head which could indicate signs of interest or curiosity. If this has happened, they will shift their posture, move a little closer to you or their eyes will start to show that what you have said has found a familiar place in their mind
- If the conversation is going well, and you’ve found a subject which is of mutual benefit then suggest you meet for a coffee
They will remember you as someone they might like to get to know better, who’s interested, interesting, genuine, likeable and helpful. This creates what is technically known as ‘The Halo Effect’, i.e. a favourable lasting impression that will stay in their mind.
Oh, by the way if you want to know what happened to the fella who chucked up over my shoes. He wandered off into the night, got caught up in a pub brawl that had spilled out into the street. The police arrived, he was arrested and spent the night in the police station (proof that there is a God!)
Happy Hunting!
Wendy Dashwood-Quick

October 9, 2009 3 Comments
Procrastination Explained…
Read this if you’ve ever spent days, weeks or months putting something off but are baffled as to why.
I worked with a Coaching client this week who had been putting off doing any cold calling for weeks and weeks, but didn’t know why. I helped him find a way around this challenge, rather than drive a truck through it. So I thought it would be useful to share this with you.
Click Below To Watch This Short 5 Minute Video
Click Here to Find Out More About DISC and Download My Free Report “What Planet Are You On? - DISC The Secrets of the Universe And You”

October 8, 2009 1 Comment
My New Book Is Outselling Alan Sugar!
My New book is now ranked higher up the Amazon Career Bestseller list than Alan Sugar’s Biography! I never EVER thought that would happen to me. Must remember the date Monday 8th June!!

June 8, 2009 1 Comment











