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Focus Your Mind With A Ritual

When I was a teenager I went on a fruit picking holiday in Cambridgeshire, along with around 100 other students from all over the world.  It was  exhausting but hilarious.  The opportunity to meet people from different cultures was smashing;  including an Italian called Max.  Now he performed a very bizarre ritual every evening before he went to sleep, and of course the girls in our group were fascinated by him…

The male and female students were housed in separate accommodation blocks, and according to reports from the boys in our group, each evening before Max went to sleep he would stand at the foot of his bed with a dagger between his teeth and mutter something completely incomprehensible in Italian and then leap head first onto his bed.  The dagger was then ceremoniously placed under his pillow.    Some might say that he was suffering with a compulsive disorder of some description, or that he was slightly crazy.  But the girls in our group (of course) thought he was dead cool.  Although perhaps the boys thought he was far too racy for the delicate English roses in our party so we never did get a look at him (annoyingly).

But he definitely was a bit of a folk hero and one of the lads.  And of course he got landed with the nickname “Mad Max”.

Now I am not for one moment encouraging you to do something quite as eccentric as this, and there could well have been a very disturbing history behind Max’s behaviour.  However, sometimes rituals do have a very important part to play in some people’s lives, particularly if it helps to focus their minds, maintain discipline and keep their resolve. 

Some people practice Tai Chi every morning, chant, walk the dog, skip, or do 20 pressups.  Some sportsmen and women are quite obsessive about their sports kit and carry out a very meticulous routine or ritual before every match.   I once had a friend who would always wear the same socks, and prepare for a squash match in exactly the same way.  

Some rituals promote a feeling of calmness and wellbeing, and the production of seratonin in the brain which reduces stress as well as sharpening up the mind. 

I’ve been a cellist for the best part of 20 years, and before I perform in a concert I always wear the same dress, the same shoes, the same earings and have a very structured routine to prepare myself.  This helps me to get into ‘the zone’.  For me this is purely because the difference between a rehearsal and a concert ‘performance’ is that the music is played just once, and then that’s it!  If you miss your cue you can’t go back and do it again.  AND with some pieces of music you may not get to see or play that piece again for sometimes 10 years!  So you really don’t want to make a mistake or miss the moment.

So, over to you.  Do you have any rituals in your life that help focus your mind?   I know that working with a task list is something I can’t do without and if my desk gets too cluttered, I go into overwhelm. 

 How does having a ritual or a clear routine help you and what happens when you don’t bother with it?

Until next time

Happy Hunting

Wendy

Image Courtesy of Google Images 2009

 According to an entrepreneur there are two types of people in the world – Entrepreneurs and ‘The Others’, and the problem with ‘The Others’ is this:-

“Into the dream you came, and across the soft carpet of my reverie you walked. With hobnail boots…”

This may resonate with an entrepreneur who has been misunderstood or maligned, because ‘The Others’ may accuse an entrepreneur of being selfish, obsessive, geeky, ever so slightly weird and focussed to the point of ruthlessness.  The term ‘The Others’ came from a conversation I had with a dedicated entrepreneur Paul Gunter    www.paul-gunter.com.  But like most entrepreneurial men and women, he believe its ‘The Others’ who need to ‘get with the programme’. 

Entrepreneurs are able to make huge sacrifices to achieve their objectives and compartmentalise chunks of their lives while an idea has gripped them by the throat, in their quest to become creative trailblazers at the cutting edge.  Inevitably they frequently leave lesser mortals standing in their wake and are the driving force behind enterprise and innovation.

Now this could lead to some challenging conversations, especially if a significant person in your life happens to be an entrepreneur.  And I know because my Dad was one.  My mother’s life in consequence was occasionally desperate, sometimes challenging, frequently very glamorous but never boring.

Unique and incomparable, an entrepreneur can overcome massive setbacks and “press on regardless”.  They are made of a special kind of metal; steel tempered in the flame which is cool to the touch, but to ‘the others’ is red hot.  So don’t get too close or you’ll get your fingers burnt.

The entrepreneurial mind never really sleeps; hardly rests and even if it does it’s alert for another idea, another opportunity which for the average person could be exhausting.  An entrepreneur ‘sees’ opportunities other people can’t. They ‘believe’ in ideas and concepts with a fervent enthusiasm which is baffling to the average Joe Soap.  For example, they will be the ones scribbling some notes on a napkin in a restaurant then hot-foot it back to HQ to put another blueprint into action, before the person with them has had time to tuck into their cheese and biscuits.

Occasionally an entrepreneur may appear to drift off and not be paying attention, until you’re forced to ask “have you even listened to a word I’ve said?!”  It’s nothing personal – they are sometimes literally on another planet.

My father’s entrepreneurial streak was always close by.  I have memories of the whole family travelling half way across the country just to eat a picnic on a piece of land my dad had earmarked for a commercial development.  He even once left me and my four kid sisters in a playground in Lisbon to amuse ourselves so he could attend a meeting. 

He was insatiably curious about everything, which was taken to extremes.  He had a telephone extension installed in every room of our house (even the downstairs cloakroom), so he wouldn’t miss a call. 

Entrepreneurs define their lives according to their own code and frequently ignore advice.  To them a mistake is a ‘learning experience’.  They lavish admiration on anyone whose achievements outshine theirs, and seek to emulate the movers and shakers in their industry on a never ending quest to improve and advance.

They eagerly await the next experience, and soon tire of the predictable and the pedestrian.  The more progress they make, the bigger their ambition and ability to live their life on their own terms becomes. 

Their strength and inner resourcefulness is inspirational to the enlightened beings who exist on the perimeter, but to ‘The Others’ e.g. anyone with no drive, ambition or courage at all, this could be perceived as selfish neglect.  An entrepreneur is not prepared to assign the direction of their life into anyone else’s hands.  To them life is always a question of “let’s make it happen!” or “what if??” or “how does that work?” and are prepared to wake up, step up and demand more. 

Sometimes the entrepreneurial gene can lie dormant for years and is only activated through adversity – so you don’t have to be born like it.

It’s also the ultimate weapon of self preservation, which is why a HUGE number of entrepreneurs were dyslexic underachievers at school – but still won through in the end.  It can also become a positive channel for delinquent energy, which otherwise might lead to a prison sentence or self destruction.

So, if you’re in close proximity to an entrepreneur – here’s a suggestion – don’t trample on, or pour cold water over, their ideas.  They are a force of nature – a tidal wave – so catch the energy, enjoy the experience or get out of the way…

When the CEO decided to allow the male employees of the company I worked for to participate in the annual girl’s Rounder’s tournament (because secretly he wanted to win) - this news was greeted very enthusiastically by the boys, who all rushed to join in.  The opportunity to show off, impress and compete was an chance not to pass up. 

As the captain I put together a team to enter the tournament; and eventually the talk in the pub at lunchtime turned to who had the best hand-eye coordination (i.e. could anyone ACTUALLY hit the ball?).

One chap confidently and  proudly informed us that at school he was a marvel and had no problems in despatching the ball into the next county, and was up for the challenge!

So we met up for our first practise session and our champion batsman stepped forth and prepared to bat, with me standing behind him as backstop.  Now, for that particular season we were fortunate that our bowler played at county level, and trained me to stand really close to the batsman so that if he or she missed the ball,  it would literally land straight into my hands.  However, she bowled so fast I had to wear padded gloves to cushion the impact. 

Our gallant Champion batsman stepped forth to prepare…and that was when I made a really big mistake.  I was so carried away by his past tales of glory that I forgot what my job was.  I forgot that the ball would be hurtling towards me at 90 mph, after it left the hands of our demon bowler.  Instead I was focussing on the bat.

The Demon bowler bowled - Batsman missed…and

Because I was looking at the BAT and NOT the BALL - the ball smacked me in the face full pelt.  I fell to the ground, saw stars and was convinced I’d gone blind, feeling really stupid and actually rather annoyed with him for not delivering the goods!

Who here can put their hand on their heart and honestly say that at some point whilst running their business they’ve never been approached by a wise man bearing gifts and been lured away from their core purpose?

 And did you discover months later that had you applied more effort and focus on what you were already doing, you’d have achieved far more instead of being distracted or seduced by something sparkly and new?

And did you feel angry at them for letting you down, and furious with yourself for taking your eye off the ball in the first place?

And did the reality of that hit you smack in the face with the realisation that you’d just wasted 6 months on a fruitless exercise?  What’s your experience and what did you do? 

Were you distracted by some inducement or get rich scheme which in fact wasn’t any better than what you were doing already? 

Relax, it’s happened to everyone.  And most of us are sadder and wiser after the event.

Here’s a top tip for next time you are faced with temptation to abandon what you’re doing in favour of something else.  Remember if you take on too much you are in danger of straying into Arthur Daley territory, galloping after the latest fad, whilst neglecting the one thing that you’d already invested a lot of time and energy in - and upon which is built your reputation.  Being a jack of all trades waters down your credibility and then others get confused about what you actually represent.  Your presence and power is diminished; because others will question what you STAND for.

If you’re in two minds about an enticing new opportunity - run the idea past your CORE PURPOSE first and ask yourself - is it the END RESULT that you’re chasing?  Does it fit with what you’re  already doing? Have you considered whether the vehicle you’ve chosen to move towards your objectives is the right one or if you’ll even enjoy the journey (and the view).

Your success is as a direct result of the choices you make - so take responsibility for the choice.  Sometimes there is merit in staying on target before you lose interest or momentum with what you are already doing; because you never know - the fire you’ve been nurturing and tending so patiently and diligently could eventually catch light…

My New book is now ranked higher up the Amazon Career Bestseller list than Alan Sugar’s Biography! I never EVER thought that would happen to me. Must remember the date Monday 8th June!!